Sleep

It's past 2 am and I am awake. Have no fear, I fell asleep at 7pm, and woke up at midnight.

Why?

Because last night I got one hour of sleep.
The night before that I got three hours of sleep.

Why?

Wish I could tell you that. I was literally counting the hours as I thrashed around in my bed, in my room, in my apartment, in Provo, UT, which is where I currently live.

First, I can't sleep. I change positions. I cover my entire body, head included, with the blanket. I unplug my printer, throw a blanket over my window, block out every light possible since that has to be the only reason I'm still awake after four hours in bed. I read something calming. I get up and stretch. I brainstorm new stories for my creative writing class. Sometimes I wake up, turn on the lights, and write down whatever comes to me. Not last night. Last night I was EXHAUSTED, and HAD TO SLEEP, since I had work at 7 am.

And yet...5 am roles around...
My legs and arms are full of a nervous energy that I can't explain. If I don't move them, it gets painful. I am so tired and frustrated that the only way I can react is by spazzing out every ten minutes or so. Lying there, quietly, the tension builds up in my limbs until I feel like someone is holding a tazer to my shins and forearms. I break my stillness and punch and kick and flex for five seconds, trying to get all of the power out of my body. The blanket flies around me. I wish I could ask someone what it looks like.

Then I lay still again. I feel tired. I'm sure it worked.

Ten minutes later.....tazer legs.