My boss does this thing, where every day she has to stand right next to my chair, and sort of stare out into nothing, and say something that seems like it would come out of a crappy sitcom or movie. She always looks at me right after, as if expecting a laugh, but it's never particularly funny. It's always cliche and sometimes doesn't make sense.
Examples:
(sigh) "Welcome to the ratrace" (sips coffee)
(sigh) "Another day in Paradise"(sips coffee)
(sigh) "It's the big show"(sips coffee)
(sigh) "As good as it gets"(sips coffee)
Her favorite is definitely the "day in paradise", but she says it in this listless, dead voice, with her eyes all glazed over, then abruptly makes eye contact with a smile on her face. I feel like if it was REALLY dramatic and one of my close friends did it, I would laugh. Like if Michael Ian Black said it, it would be stupid amounts of funny.
But she is my boss. We don't really hang around exchanging goofy office banter, and she kinda mails it in. Maybe I should give her notes on inflection, really hitting one word and just selling it, HARD.
Yeah, and I'll start coaching her on new material to try out on the kitchen staff. Michael Ian Black, afterall, is only funny because he is the master of timing+facial expression. I'll show her his show "Stella," she'll turn into a huge hit, and next thing you know, throw a brick wall behind this woman! Give her a microphone! I have created the greatest events-coordinator-gone-comedian EVER.
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